How do we nurture resilience in our children?

How can we help children grow into confident individuals who can handle setbacks and adapt to change?

This important question guided our recent EtonHouse Parenting Webinar on building resilience in children, where educators shared practical strategies families can use to support children through challenges and everyday difficulties.

Resilience is not about avoiding obstacles, but helping children develop the skills to navigate them. During the session, parents explored how resilience supports children in managing emotions, overcoming frustrations, and growing into capable and confident individuals over time.

One helpful framework discussed in the webinar is the "7 Cs of Building Resilience in Children" as identified by renowned paediatrician and author, Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg, along with practical approaches parents can apply at home.

The 7 Cs of Building Resilience in Children:

According to Dr. Ginsburg, building resilience in children involves fostering seven key skills, often referred to as the "7 Cs." These skills can be nurtured over time to provide children with a solid foundation for navigating life's challenges:

1. Competence: Encourage children to develop skills and abilities in various domains, such as academics, sports, arts, or social interactions. By experiencing success in different areas, children build confidence and a belief in their own capabilities.
2. Confidence: Help children develop a positive self-image by acknowledging their strengths and achievements. Encouraging them to take on new challenges while providing support and guidance along the way will boost their confidence levels.
3. Connection: Foster strong connections between children and their family, friends, and community. Building a support system helps children feel secure and provides them with a network of people they can turn to for guidance and comfort.
4. Character: Teach children the importance of ethical values, empathy, and responsibility. By instilling a strong sense of morals and integrity, children will develop a solid character that guides their decision-making and interactions with others.
5. Contribution: Encourage children to contribute positively to their community and society. By engaging in acts of kindness, volunteering, or helping others, children learn the value of making a difference and understand the power of their actions.
6. Coping: Teach children healthy coping mechanisms (e.g. Kelso's Choice) to manage stress, disappointment, and adversity. Strategies such as deep breathing, talking about feelings, and engaging in physical activities can help children build resilience and emotional well-being.
7. Control: Empower children by providing opportunities for them to make decisions and solve problems independently. Developing a sense of control over their own lives helps children build resilience and adaptability.

3 Key Strategies to Nurture Resilience:

While understanding the 7 Cs provides a comprehensive framework, there are three key strategies that can help nurture resilience in children:

1. The Power of YET: Encourage a growth mindset by emphasising the word "YET" when children face challenges and setbacks. For example, instead of saying, "You can't do it," rephrase it to, "You can't do it YET." This simple shift in language helps children understand that their abilities can be developed with effort and perseverance.
2. Acknowledging the relationship between resilience and emotions: Help children recognise and manage their emotions effectively. Resilience isn't about suppressing emotions but rather understanding and addressing them in a healthy manner. By teaching children to identify their emotions and express them constructively, we equip them with essential life skills.
3. Learning through mistakes: Encourage a positive attitude towards mistakes and failures. Teach children that setbacks are opportunities for growth and learning. When children understand that making mistakes is a natural part of the learning process, they develop resilience and are more willing to take risks and persevere.

Building resilience is a gradual process supported through consistent relationships, guidance, and opportunities to practise problem-solving. When adults respond with patience and encouragement, children develop the confidence to handle future challenges.

At EtonHouse schools, our Reggio Emilia-inspired environments emphasise strong relationships, emotional well-being, and respectful guidance. Children are supported to develop independence, confidence, and problem-solving skills in ways that reflect the resilience-building approaches shared in the webinar.

Resources:

• Book recommendations for children:
  • I Can’t Do That Yet: Growth Mindset by Esther Pia Cordova
  • Perseverance: I Have Grit! by Jodie Shepherd 
    
• Fostering Resilience – Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg
• Kelso Recommends – The Digital Library

Discover how our Reggio Emilia inspired learning environment supports your child’s confidence, resilience, and love for learning